Did you know that January 12th is, "Quitters Day"? According to research it's proven to be the day that most people begin giving up on their New Year’s resolutions. Other research shows that by the second week in February, 80% of people have resigned their goals to failure. Does this sound like you? Here's how to stop getting in your own way. Use these tips to get back on the horse and gallop through the finish line...
The Holidays are upon us! They can bring a host of joys and sorrows with them. Use these quick tips to skate through the Grinch’s and Gremlin’s efforts to sabotage your holiday spirit. When the dinner rolls are burning and the kids are screaming, reach out for help. Delegate. Your partner and sister could enjoy having a task assigned to them. They’ll have a sense of ownership and purpose, and you’ll have a sense of relief. When Aunt Sally teams up with Negative Nancy to criticize the gifts, dinner, or activities take a deep breath. Hit your pause button and reflect on what could be motivating her behavior - her aches and pains, poor sleep, “h-anger” (hungry-anger)...
Have you noticed that it's difficult to focus on abundance? Gratitude seems like a chore, and being thankful with so much hardship in the world seems frivolous? Gently ask yourself this question - How does my suffering relieve the suffering of others? Pause, breathe, and take a break just for a moment from the pain of the world to notice what is abundant in your life. You deserve and need hope. You deserve and need moments of relief. You deserve and need to feel grateful so that you can continue to shine your light to make this world a better place for everyone - one person, one interaction, one gesture at a time. When you function from a place of love, honesty, and nonjudgement you open yourself to limitless possibilities. Fear, anger, and judgement shut down creative processes and keep you small. Let...
Yesterday, I was taking a taxi cab across town to Penn Station with my dad. Our driver grunted and mumbled about gridlock the whole way. Clearly, he was frustrated and angry. When we arrived at our destination, he barked, “No tip? Get out of the car!”. I showed him the $2 in my hand intended for him when he said, “Forget it! Get out! I have to go to work!”. I calmly and perplexedly replied, “You ARE at work. You’re already there.”. I got out of the car and wondered what I tend to rush through. You know that sense of urgency and pressure that compels you to hurry? It fuels impatience and frustration. It short circuits your effectiveness. It’s the focus on what’s next...
Get 15% off your first three psychotherapy or coaching sessions during Oasis Week! This applies to new clients beginning services between October 16 - 20, 2017. Register now! Space is limited. ...
How to conquer a phobia: The psychology behind phobias and how you can face them Jackson A. Thomas interviewed me for tips on managing anxiety and panic. Check out the article published in Chicago's Community Health Magazine. They often come out when it rains and they’re used as fish bait. But Candace Tucker isn’t going anywhere near them. “I used to fish with my dad and sisters a lot, so naturally worms were involved,” says Tucker, a resolution specialist in Parma, Ohio. “The more I looked at them I started noticing how nasty they are. It’s the smell of them, how they wiggle and the nastiest part: They can grow another head if one is cut off.” This fear of worms, called vermiphobia or scoleciphobia, has inflicted Tucker since...
An hour before the eclipse, my eldest cat jumped into the windowsill. She seemed to know we were on the cusp of an astrological anomaly. Oregon would be the first to experience it. Since I’m in NYC, I turned on the news and watched. Then, headed to my rooftop and awaited the northeast reveal. Wary to look directly at the sun because of warnings about permanent retinal damage, I wondered how I could see something I can’t look at. So I positioned my iphone camera toward the sun and it became my eyes. I took many photographs hoping for a brief separation in the clouds to capture this unusual phenomenon. Others were on their rooftops and balconies also awaiting a glimpse of the partial sun....
Someone yanked the carpet out from under you. You’re flabbergasted, broken-hearted, and wondering if you’ll ever love again. You thought this was the one. It’s hard to imagine life without him. You were already thinking about next steps - marriage and children. What will you tell your friends and family? What will they think of you? Where did you go wrong? Your mind races as the tears flow. It hurts. Yet, as much as you wanted it to work, it wasn’t a perfect relationship anyway. In fact, there’s no perfect relationship. But, what now? Allow yourself to cry. The loss of a relationship - even if YOU did the breaking up - is a loss. It can feel like a mini grief cycle. Your feelings will...
I heard the crash of my beloved pottery as it shattered on the cement floor. It jolted me. It freed me. 17 years ago when I was starting out as a potter (one of my passions), I toiled endlessly to make each piece perfect. The walls needed to be straight. The mouth perfectly circular, and the form of the body exact - that's the beauty and the art of it. My instructor painfully witnessed my labor and determination for perfection everyday. I attended every open studio session and took multiple classes per week. I knew if I worked hard enough, I'd get it. One night that instructor suggested non-attachment to the work. I had no idea of what he meant. He might as well have been speaking a foreign language...
Let’s go alternate reality. Yes, AR. What’s your biggest wish for this year? Five years from now? Or for your lifetime? Tap into the full experience of that image. Be the hero in your own game. One where you make the rules. You tell the story. You determine the outcome. What’s there? Who’s there? Smell the scents, see the colors, connect to the people, hear the sounds, engage with your surroundings. Notice the energy that fills you up. Close your eyes. Lock it in. Wait. Did I hear the voice of self doubt? Disbelief? Uncertainty? It’s okay. It’s what we do. Notice it and dismiss it. Shift your focus to what you want. The nasty little self critic gremlin works hard at sabotaging your dreams. It’s...
