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Stress Management

ritual grief quarantine

Ritual. Grief. Quarantine.

Ritual. It brings family, friends, and communities together. It binds you in your values. It bonds you in your shared beliefs. It connects your  mind, body, and spirit. But what if rituals don't exist? Sunday was Easter. I’m not a terribly religious person, but I knew that I wouldn’t be with my family for a traditional gathering. And it felt like a freight train rolled in and parked on my chest. I woke up sad. The familiar heavy fog of longing for something that wouldn’t be, had settled in while I slept. My family ritual was not happening today. And I'm not alone in that. Weddings, funerals, bar & bat mitzvah's, seders, school & sports events, and more have also been cancelled or modified. It's a loss...

trauma, emdr, therapy

Dear Trauma: EMDR changes lives

Dear trauma, I don’t need you anymore. You served a purpose and kept me safe in the face of danger. But now you’re getting in my way. I got this. Yours truly. When trauma happens, your central nervous system reacts in one of 4 ways to protect you:  Fight - physically defending yourself  Flight - running away Freeze - if I don’t move, they won’t see me - think deer in headlights Faint - playing dead It’s involuntary and automatic. It’s your body‘s way of protecting you in the moment. So, thank your body for doing that - and let it know you’re safe now. In the case of PTSD and limiting beliefs, it’s not enough to know you’re safe. Your body's protective mechanisms get frozen in time...

2020 Vision: 29 life-balance tips

Make 2020 a breakthrough year. Stress, fatigue, and overwhelm can keep your head spinning and your to-do list growing. Get off the hamster wheel in 2020 and begin taking corrective action. It’s counterintuitive but, it all starts with slowing down. Make 2020 the year of YOU. Follow these simple tips to hit the reset button. Build clarity, energy, and focus...

mindful holidays

Holiday Magic: Mindful strategies

‘Tis the season to be jolly, right? Well, sometimes. If you take a mindful look at the way you approach the holidays, you'll find that you actually have a mixture of feelings - like joy and sorrow, pleasure and stress, boredom and excitement, for instance. The holidays can be bittersweet, especially for those who have lost someone they love. They are stressful for those forced to mingle with family members they don’t admire. And they are lonely for those who are alone. It’s a time ripe with celebration, gratitude, and giving. And it’s a time of wishing and grieving.  So whatever your circumstances, how do you surf the waves of emotion that arise during the holidays? Mindful practices can keep you rooted in your truth, feeling ground, and present,...

hatred vs empowerment

Hatred vs. Empowerment: Flip the Script

Sexual harassment. Terrorism. Racism. Genocide. Human trafficking. Dis - empowerment. The list goes on. We are divisive and rageful, hateful and blaming, exploiting and violent. You feel exhausted, disempowered, and depressed. Your power is not in what separates you, it’s in what connects you to others. It’s in being receptive rather than reactive. Your conscious mind’s ability to reflect, evaluate, and problem solve sets you apart from other animals. You choose how to think and behave. You crave empowerment, self worth, and purpose. You need to feel connection, love, and belonging - without it you suffer. These are basic human needs. As long as food, shelter, and safety are provided, you aspire for meaning and a higher purpose. It’s visceral and biological. Looking outward isn’t as...

Heather Edwards psychotherapy coach

SAD AF: Slay the happiness vampire

This is for the dreamers, overachievers, procrastinators, and perfectionists. It’s a the middle of winter. A time that can be bleak and isolative. The days are fleeting. The nights are long. Gray skies blanket the possibilities and stifle your mood like a punch in the gut. SAD knocks at your door like the vampire of happiness. Your bed looks more and more inviting. Your motivation escapes you. You’re tired, a little somber, and you worry about your future. This is S.A.D. (Seasonal Affective Disorder). S.A.D. resembles a mild depression and typically occurs in winter. It challenges many of us - the creatives, the empaths, and everyone in between. In case you’re wondering if you have S.A.D. (Seasonal Affective Disorder) here are a few symptoms: decreased energy increased appetite (for...

Holiday

Holiday Madness – Your Survival Kit

Holiday jingles, blockbuster sales, a wintry crispness, and Santa Claus tales fill the air. 'Tis the season of Diwali, Thanksgiving, Black Friday, Hanukkah, Christmas, Kwanzaa, and more!   You’re inspired by the holiday hustle. So, you shop, decorate, and party hop through the bustle. You’re exhausted, stressed, and excited. Because there’s so much to see and do, the pressure is on and you’re feeling blue. Since the checklist is growing your emotions are throwing a fit. You must find the perfect gift and prepare a delightful meal. Your jaw-dropping style needs to be kept and somehow, you gotta deal. So, your heart swells and your wallet shrinks. Peace and calm escape with the chimney sweep. Therefore, family time, expectations, and self imposed stressors can suck the joy out of...

Psychology Today: Overcoming Fear

This article was featured in Psychology Today on January 7, 2015.  Click here to see it on PT!   Get Past Your Fear:Psychology 101 teaches students everywhere that besides food, water, and air, the most basic of human needs is SAFETY. Just watching the news can be traumatizing.  News and media build their audience by sensationalizing real and/or perceived threats to their viewers’ personal and public safety. We’re easily captivated by the shock and horror of natural disasters and man’s relentless capability to commit heinous acts (like terrorism or videos of beheading etc.).Headlines can scare us, like the recent massacre in Paris. They grab our attention, shake us up, anddare us to let go. We must be able to learn what we need to know, and yet live our lives. Our psyche...

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Toolbox for Health and Happiness

My excitingly educational cousin, Jessi Haggerty, RD asked me to share my toolbox for happiness and stress management during the cool and blustery months of fall and winter. Schedules, expectations, and priorities change with the waning of the long and happy-go-lucky days of summer. It’s an exciting lifestyle shift for many, and an anxiety provoking one for others.  How does one maintain the relaxed, positive glow of summer throughout the other three seasons?  Follow these tips for a quick tune up when your psychic engine starts to sputter… 10. Positive Affirmations.   Look out for #1.  Remind yourself of your worth.  Find a mantra that gives you energy and a forward focus.  I like these… I am basically alright as I am.  I am free to make...

Psychology Today – Saying Goodbye to Hurt

Lingering resentment from things that have gone wrong is hard to shake. Whether it’s the result of a bad break up or a job loss, it’s best to find some resolution. It would be wonderful if we all got exactly what we wanted, and when we wanted it.  But, the hard truth is that good things often take a lot of time and usually a few set backs along the way. Once you’ve made a strong commitment and things still don’t work out, how do you pick up the pieces and carry on?  To find your center again, you'll have to muster the strength to let go of negative feelings and shift your attention to a world that is more positive. So, how do you get that betrayal or toxic...